‘This Ain’t Denver, Folks. It's Montrose.’
by Casey "Gnomus" Whitney
Feb 07, 2014 | 812 views | 0 0 comments | 45 45 recommendations | email to a friend | print


Walking through our fair metropolis in the early twilit evening a few weeks ago, I came to the stop sign at Park and South 1st. Heading East on 1st, I discerned that Park's traffic had sufficiently subsided for the moment, and was safe enough to cross.

There was a car at the stop sign "cattycorner" to my own, with their blinker on, indicating the drivers desire to turn left into the lane I was currently traversing. I assumed they were patiently waiting for me to vacate my corporeal form from their vehicular path, and continued on my whimsical way...Assumption, dear readers, is a fickle friend...Midway through Park's southbound lane, my reverie was rudely interrupted by the driver and her hastily hurtling Honda, driven directly towards my brightly attired and well lit self at such an alarming rate, it seemed intentional.

With the deftly honed reflexes only a well trained Jedi could possess, I narrowly dodged the automotive onslaught, slapping the side of her car as she passed Her face, bathed in the ghostly blue glow of her cell phones screen, in which she was ardently absorbed, ran through a gamut of expressions as realization seeped into her technologically occupied attention. As she slammed on her brakes, shock, anger,then alarmed comprehension played across her visage.

In that eternal second, we briefly made eye contact and , obviously shaken, she began to cry. Though a bit rattled myself, I regained my composure and waved to her that all was well; and continued on my merry quest, she continuing on hers..ships passing  in the night.

Walking on, I began to muse upon the prevalence of texting and driving, and the increasingly perilous status of being a pedestrian, animal , or cyclist in an over occupied, fuel driven, machinistic culture: a culture that seems to be in such a bloody self important rush, that healthy interaction between humans and their environment has become an endangered concept. I mean this ain’t Denver folks. It's Montrose. Where the hell is there to go in such a damn hurry anyway?

Being of an indigenous and organic persuasion, I could easily channel this letter into a raving rant on the evils of "progress" and dehumanization, but i shall reign in (too late I fear) my rambling Taoist tendencies and focus upon a trend that is easily remedied with modest effort and sincere intent. Pedestrians have the right of way. Period. Yes, even those careless ambling persons and foolhardy daredevil types that give the rest of us a bad rap. I have, on innumerable occasions, witnessed elderly citizens, children, and mothers with baby strollers wait for several minutes at designated crosswalks for the incessant hordes of traffic to subside and allow them safe passage.

This is rude and inexcusable behavior, hardly befitting a "civilized" society. Happily, there are still a large percentage of folks considerate and aware enough to yield at appropriate intersections, and I applaud your humanity and grace.It is my sincere prayer that your compassion and patient awareness will inspire others to slow down and Share the Road. We're all in this beautiful mess together. Let us make it as pleasant a journey as possible shall we?       


– Casey "Gnomus" Whitney                                     

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